Veritable Plethora

That’s it. That’s all I wanted to say.

Okay, the “Chroni-what-cles of Narnia” thing was pretty funny, but everything else he’s done, except for the “Lettuce” and “Hitting People While They’re Eating” videos, is not funny.

His Jack Johnson impression is so off base, it’s ridiculous.

Andy Samberg isn’t funny. But that’s just one man’s opinion. Weigh in on this, invisible readers. But only if you agree with me.

In a report from capitol hill today, it was reported that a small clause was attached to the recent Senate Appropriations bill that, if passed, would put a ban on the phrase, “That’s how I roll,” particularly when used by Vice Presidents of Sales in medium-sized banks in Southern California.

This group of professionals, or “striped shirts,” an epithet derived from this segment’s proclivity for wearing long sleeved, striped collared shirts to clubs or bars, may no longer use the popular phrase when talking about weekend or evening activities.

Still in debate is whether this group can use the all-encompassing, flashy-lifestyle evoking catchphrase in reference to their vehicles or other modes of transportation, instances in which “how I roll” is grounded in the physical realm and could actually be construed to have meaning.

Officials argued that this is a moot point because no one would ever use this phrase to convey any actual meaning.

In rebuttal, a spokesman for the group of middle managers said, “I would absolutely use this phrase to convey actual meaning. But that’s how I….Oh, I see.”